Sometimes It's Just the Luck of the Draw

Sometimes in life things just happen that you didn't want to happen. People change or they make decisions that you don't expect and it leaves you hurting and confused and in a different place than you thought you would be. Sometimes it's getting past something you didn't expect to hold onto you so tight. Sometimes the person you love can't love you when they always said they would. Or the things that made you who you are you suddenly can't do anymore and your identity has to change. Somehow circumstances leave you helpless and crumbling. A lot of people close to me are in pain right now. When life decides to twist your world and rip and bruise your heart... it's hard to know what to do or who to be or how to be or why to keep being at all. And I don't know why it has to happen; the people in my life that are hurting so much... they don't deserve that pain, from whoever or whatever in their world caused it. Different people get different cards and as we go along, we all get a really bad hand that just takes us down to nothing and we have to regroup just to get back into the game. But, if you wait and you know which cards to keep and which cards to let go of, you can get that once in a lifetime hand. And when you do, cash in your chips and sit back and enjoy it for a while and treasure the win. Cause sooner or later we all have to keep playing. This card analogy probably makes no sense, but hey I tried.
To sum it up like John would: "Here's the thing:" ;) We're all doing our best to be happy. We all have to take a few trips to hell to earn it. The sharper the pain, the more refined the happiness later. Trust me. You have to pay your dues and sometimes life's going to step on you and there will be nothing you can do but hurt with a searing pain you thought couldn't exist. But, if you're strong, you heal and the scar tissue makes you stronger than before and you get back in that game and you call. (I don't know why the poker...) And the dealer respects you for it and knew you'd be back. I cashed in those chips when my Johnny came back to me all those years ago. I'm glad I did; we don't have the best hand right now and we don't have much to put into the pot. But he's the ace up my sleeve and I do feel like I've cheated life a little. I don't know how I got so lucky. I wish I could heal my dear friends. Hell, I wish I could take the pain for them, every last bit. But, I can't. I can just be here for them and try to help them get back in the game later. And I just want them all to know that I admire how well they bear that pain and I see them rising out of it and I am astounded by their tenacity. It's beautiful. I applaud you.