Not today, suckas!

The past several days have been CRAZY! I know, I know -- I married John so life obviously would be crazy. ;) ~I love my Johnny.~ But this even threw him for a loop, which rarely happens.
Let's start from the beginning. Last week I was looking through apartment listings on KSL.com. I had looked through all the apartments we could afford on our recent budget -- hey, a yellow fridge could be fun -- and then I saw this ad for a job as a Personal Driver. I sent John the link and he shot the guy an email. The guy replied, saying his name was John Telnet (....ok) and that he was a 58-yr-old Geologist from Montana and that he was hiring a driver for his wife who would be in Salt Lake for several months as a missionary. 3 days a week, 2 hours a day, $500 a week. We're thinking, Indeed! He sent John a 5 question interview through email with odd grammar choices in it. John responded and sent his resume. Mr. Telnet thanked him and said he'd get back to him. Thursday - the day before our 10-yr little celebration - we get an envelope from UPS at the door. Inside is nothing but 2 money orders for $950 each from a Vanessa Vaughn in Taylor, Texas. We know no Vanessa Vaughn. We search her online and ask John's aunt from Texas to check into it. There is no such person at that address. John decided to run down to the UPS office and ask them if they could let him call the phone number and talk to this person. He found out that the UPS account doesn't exist. UPS called Wells Fargo, the bank these money orders were for, and they asked John to bring them down. At the bank he learned that the orders were actually purchased in Alaska. The bank says that they should give the orders and the envelope to the FBI (the envelope is for forensic guys to examine -- oh, snap!).
The next day we realize John Telnet had emailed us 2 hours before we received the package. One of his "clients" (Geologists don't have clients) sent us the money orders, apparently. He asked that we cash the money orders "immediately" and wire the money to his wife's travel agent and gave the woman's name and address (the address doesn't exist, we checked). John emailed him and said to call him. The guy actually did. He had a thick accent and sounded like he was in his early 20's, not 58. John asked what field of Geology the man had specialized in. He answers, "Research." Uh-huh. John repeats that he was wondering what field. The man responds, "The formation of rocks." :-| John says he doesn't believe that this is a legitimate deal and the guy hangs up. About 15 minutes later he calls back and repeats, "Geophysics" over and over. To be a geophysicist you'd have to have a master's degree and have passed some of the most difficult math and physics courses out there. I'm guessing - just guessing, mind you - that you'd need to be able to write a paragraph. That's my hunch. We let the FBI know the rest of the information, so hopefully they can catch the scumbags. When Mr. Telnet called a third time, John told him the FBI were tracing the call and we haven't heard from him since. The ordeal lasted until yesterday.
I wanted to make sure that everyone knows that this kind of thing happens. I had a feeling in my gut when we got those money orders that told me something was very wrong and we followed it and boy am I glad. Otherwise, we'd be trying to pay the bank that $1900!
Of course, we feel quite mighty to have outsmarted the crooks and we will celebrate by going and getting library cards tomorrow and checking us out some movies! ...Maybe Close Encounters... hmmm. =D